“Love is blind” narrative has harmed many relationships
In my honest opinion, I think that the phrase, “love is blind”, has caused more harm than good and the reasons are simple.
We see people, ladies especially, stay in toxic/abusive relationships and as an “outsider” you wonder why.
How can someone you are dating, abuse you with every chance he gets, disrespect you, reduce you until there is nothing left of your ego/self-esteem and you still stay in the relationship? But when you are asked why you hide behind the word “love”.
Crush may be blind, lust may be blind, but true love is NOT blind.
Lust or crush may ignore the truth for fear of losing out, but true love always makes the best decisions. This is why you have to first love yourself before you can truly love someone else.
The love you have for someone should not blind you. You should open your eyes and know where to draw the line. Not all good decisions feel sweet initially, but in the long run, it’s what is best.
Love is patient, kind and caring; love endures, tolerates, corrects and forgives; love is not selfish; love can shield/protect from outsiders but inside, it brings positive change. The motive of love is always genuine. So if it doesn’t feel like love, why pretend it is?
Also, read LOVE ZONE: Behavioural modification is not the same as good behaviour
Love is a choice you should make after you have known someone and once you realise it’s worth it, nurture it until it grows/blossoms into something magnificent.
Love is not living in denial or ignoring the truth. You must KNOW first then CHOOSE next.
When we understand this, we can make better decisions, based first on a person’s values and character, before our additional desires e.g. “I love her because she is sexy, have you seen her backside?” “I love him because he is rich and he spoils me silly”, “I love him because he is so educated and eloquent”, “I love him because he lives abroad and I know my future is secured” etc. These may not be bad reasons/wishes, but they should be additions, not the main focus of your choice/decision.
Let’s get the foundation right because having a healthy family structure in our nation, will help resolve more than half of the moral decadence issues we are facing in our society today.
It all starts from the home.
We say we need a great nation, right? Then let’s play our part one step at a time
God bless us all
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